How to Raise Emotionally Intelligent Children
Lael Stone · TEDxDocklands
The argument here is simple and slightly uncomfortable: children do not learn emotional regulation from being told how to feel. They learn it from watching what adults do when big feelings arrive.
Lael Stone works through what it looks like to stay present with a distressed child rather than managing the distress away, and why the instinct to fix a feeling quickly often teaches the opposite of what was intended.
Stay
Remain present instead of ending the feeling quickly.
Allow
Let the emotion finish rather than redirecting it.
Model
Show your own regulation out loud where children can see it.
It reframes the adult's role rather than adding another technique to the pile, which is usually the more durable change.
Parent education evenings, staff discussion, and caregivers who have already tried the tactical advice and want the layer underneath it.
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Lael Stone · TEDxDocklands · March 31, 2020 · 12:11
A TEDx talk reflects one speaker's perspective. Pair it with clinical guidance where a child needs support.